I was never good with words, so why did I choose to become a writer? It could be because I’m an idiot.

For a while now I’ve been working on a novel, one that I will never finish writing. I started working on it in 2009, ten years ago — that’s a whole decade! Ha-ha!

I’m a dreamer and a procrastinator. I’m a time eater. I should be writing when I’m home, but I don’t. I watch porn.

I read a lot. That’s good. But that’s also bad because I never do any writing. I take a lot of notes. I save a lot of quotes. But I never write more than a couple of hundred words.

Look, I’m not trying to say anything. When the sun is dead and the stars are shining, I put on my black coat and run out the door.

I like to drink. I like to drink.